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I am an introvert.
And I ended up with an extroverted child.
I don’t know how this happened.
I never expected to have an extrovert, because PH and I are both total introverts.
We get exhausted by stimulation and need time alone to recharge. We process social interactions slowly and find interacting with humans to be really difficult and often unpleasant. Introverts are the universal energy donors of the universe. Extroverts extract energy from the environment, but the environment leeches energy from us. So we hide from it.
We were both sedate, easy-to-handle children. I, as an only child, hung out in my room much of the day either reading or concocting elaborate imaginary worlds starring myself as some kind of animal. PH spend his childhood creating the perfect fantasy baseball team by examining the statistics on his baseball cards.
If you had asked me how I pictured my future son I would have described a blond, round-faced boy with a serious expression who needed time to warm up in strange situations. When Owl was in the womb I even thought he was showing introverted characteristics.
Hahahahahahahahaha!
Owl is not an introvert.
I have suspected it for a long time, but there is no longer any room for reasonable doubt. He loves new situations, loves doing new things, doesn’t care if his schedule is disrupted, remains cheerful so long as there is something new to stimulate him, and gets cranky if we hang around the house too much.
In a way, it makes him really easy. I can take him out in public without tantrums, and I’m not a slave to his schedule.
BUT.
It does not mesh well with my needs.
The Farm Fairy, whose son is more of an ambivert (like his mother) noticed a difference when she was babysitting Owl the other day. While her own son was happy to sit and play if she left the room, my kid would follow her from room to room, demanding interactions.
It’s wearing me down.
It’s not that I don’t like interacting with him, because I do. He’s frigging hilarious, this kid. He makes me laugh so hard with all his clowning and he says and does the cutest things.
But I’m SO. TIRED.
He eats all of my energy, like the world’s cutest little vampire, except he drinks mana instead of blood. Oh, and milk. Mana and milk.
It’s difficult enough to be an introvert in the working world.
When hour after hour of interacting with humans is required of you, you get drained fast. I had ways of dealing with it. I spent an hour in front of the computer in the morning, or reading in the bath, or both, just gearing up for work. Then, at lunch (which was an hour long), I would hide in a corner with a book. When I got home I’d spend some time with PH and then go on the internet and/or read and/or take another bath.
Not any more!
From 4 or 5 in the morning onward, Owl is on me. I am dragged out of bed by him, feed him breakfast, dress him, bring him with me on the dog walk, put him in the car, take him to daycare… and then I work. I work 9 hour days and I don’t get a lunch break.
In vet clinics, there really is no such thing as lunch break. It’s a medical environment. No one who will willingly say “yeah, that sick cat has to wait for me to finish reading this chapter” lasts long in the field. My last boss insisted on people taking lunch breaks, but then when days got too busy to make such a thing possible, you just didn’t eat at all. My new boss takes a more practical tack. She pays us for the whole day, with no lunch break, but IF there’s time, we are welcome to eat and take a break – paid. It works. But it means that I can snatch a few minutes to eat or run next door to buy a brownie, but I can’t hide in the corner and read for an hour. I can’t even check Facebook.
PH doesn’t have it any better. Since I need the car to take Owl to and from Daycare, PH has to transit to work. That means that in order to make it to work for 8 AM, he has to be out of the house at 6:45 AM. He doesn’t return to the house until 6:15 PM. So he’s gone for 11 and a half hours of the day just to work an 8 hour day.
On the bright side, he has time on the bus/train/ferry to read. On the downside, he is surrounded by humans and I tend to get texts from him saying things like this:
The person next to me is playing “Angels We Have Heard On High” on the recorder over and over again… VERY BADLY.
Then PH and I feed Owl, bathe him and put him to bed. By then it’s 9 at night and we’re wiped. We can spend time with each other, or time alone, and since we both want to spend time with each other but NEED time alone we take compromises where he watches TV and I blog. Occasionally one of us just orders the other into bed.
We’re so exhausted.
One thing I’ll say about having an extrovert: it gets you out of the house. Now, on weekends, we actively seek out activities to entertain Owl, because keeping him home all day is a recipe for misery.
Suddenly, extroverted locations like playgrounds, indoor play gyms, farmer’s markets, community events, and Canada Day on Granville Island are the most desirable thing to us, because they entertain Owl so we don’t have to.
When Owl is outside, or somewhere new, he is easy. He explores everything, chatters about everything, and is just… happy. He isn’t clinging or demanding milk or begging us to read Hippos Go Berserk for the umpteenth time. He’s just being cute and happy.
Yeah, extroverted locations are better for us introverts, nowadays.
So we’re taking Owl to Vegas, which is basically extrovertland.
We expect to find it very restful.
Oh, parenting an extrovert. Nothing but sympathy over here. H. was exactly like this as a small child, and even now he needs activities on a daily basis to keep him happy. I can’t remember the last time we spent an entire weekend at home with him; it’s just not worth the angst.
On the plus side, you get forced to do lots of things you would normally never do because they are way outside your comfort zone.
On the minus side, see above.
Have fun in Vegas. It’s a place I’d like to visit, someday. Maybe. If the hotel rooms are soundproofed and have light-blocking curtains.
At least you’re an extrovert, too, right? The thing is, introverts don’t WANT to go do things, even things within their comfort zone :-p
But… I’m *not* an extrovert. At all. Never have been. My husband is, though.
Oh, for some reason I thought you had said you were at some point. My bad!
No worries. At first blush people think I’m extroverted, because I talk a lot and I can get kind of loud, but that’s usually because I’m terrified and I’m trying to cover it up. 🙂
No, I figured it out – you say you’re an extrovert here: https://ifbyyes.wordpress.com/2011/03/20/i-am-introvert-hear-me-speak-in-a-reasonable-tone-of-voice/#comments
PS I edited your children’s names in the comments ot protect their secret identities.
What is an ambivert?
Neither flesh nor fowl nor good red herring – falling in the shades of grey between extrovert and introvert
Thank you for the literary explanation 🙂
Sounds absolutely exhausting. Wish I had a Mana potion to send over, like you could in an MMO, but alas. 😦 I’m guessing you still want more kids, though. How long do you think you’d leave it before having a second? Let Owl get a bit older first so you have some time to rest before it starts all over again? On the plus side, #2 might be an introvert. 🙂
Is it wrong that I want to do the next pregnancy with no wellbutrin in case that had an effect? It’s weird because I love Owl and wouldn’t change him if I could but… I also want an introvert next time.
Who knows what effect those kind of drugs can have on a pregnancy? Hope you can do without it for the duration of the pregnancy … and probably a bit before as well, to make sure it’s out of your system.
Don’t know whether this is on the cards for you guys, but one of the best sources of relief is a SIBLING – preferably one as close in age as possible. I didn’t plan to have my kids a mere 20 months apart (that happened because I assumed we’d have a hard time conceiving the second time around and then we, um, didn’t) – but it has been such a great thing to have kids close enough in age that they can play together and enjoy the same things. They both give far more attention to each other than either one gives to me, which leaves me in blessed peace for at least part of the day!
I believe you. I have to say that I enjoy sitting my friends’ kids for just that reason. Hmm we’d always planned a larger gap…
Ah! The sibling issue. I would like to have more, but so many people who know me in real life are shocked by that because I had PPD after my daughter was born. Funny how people weigh in on that decision for you….
Ppd doesn’t always recur, especially if you know you’re a risk going into it and head it off at the pass.
Much sympathy coming your way. 🙂
I used to have to go away with a group of students for a long weekend sometimes, which meant being “on”, and alert, and professional, and entertaining, and surrounded by people literally every hour of the day that I wasn’t asleep. I was EXHAUSTED, but could not explain to co-workers why an hour of a more low key activity, still surrounded by a huge group of people I was responsible for and who wanted to talk to me, did not refresh me completely as it did them. I like people plenty, but I would have sold my soul for just an hour alone on those trips.
Good luck with your little extravert!
Yes, I would definitely find that exhausting. One of the reasons that I rejected becoming a teacher (although it was on my maybe list)
I have a feeling etc is leaning that way, and in some ways I’m happy, because I think that life might be easier for extroverts. But it’s hard for me to contemplate a life of being on the go. Right now I’m lucky that she’s excited to go to the grocery store. And I’m going to start taking her to “Nursery Time” at the library. Because she’ll be an extrovert who still loves reading, dammit.
Definitely. There’s no reason that extroversion and aversion to reading need to go together, although most extroverts I know are not readers. Hannah’s Harry gives me hope – extrovert, but BIG reader!
I’m definitely an introvert, but I don’t know that I was an introverted small child. I certainly was extremely demanding. My mother says that I required constant attention and interaction until I learned to read, when I suddenly became quite easy.
I hope that’s the case for Owl!
Chuckling picturing you and PH handing Owl a huge cup of coins for the slot machines!
It’d keep him busy! Flashy lights, bells… Although right now the window in our bedroom is almost as fascinating. “More cars! More! Cars! Copters! More More More!!!”
The mister and I are in your boat too. He and I are both hermits, him more than me, and Georgia is a huge extrovert. Walk into a mall and suddenly it’s “Hi” “Hi” “Hi” and hands all over everything, running in every direction. And while I’m relieved she’s not scared of everyone and everything, I agree that it is exhausting. And not just at the mall. She’s always on but that is probably just a toddler thing. I HOPE it’s just a toddler thing and that she will mellow a tad when she has a little more autonomy.
I’m embarassed to admit I have succumbed to putting Dora or Sesame Street when I need a breather. It doesn’t entertain her for longer than three to five minutes intervals but that is okay, that’s enough break for me to pee 🙂
My life saver is a toy fisher price street with ramps from the eighties that we picked up for two bucks at a swap meet. It entertains him for minutes! Balls are also good for entertainment, and lately he has become obsessed with puzzles. It all helps!
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