Well, Babby, or the artist soon to be known as Owl, survived his first week away from me. Four full time days away from me, and then another with his Daddy.
He doesn’t seem to mind in the least. He watches me go in the mornings, but he doesn’t cry. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop; for him to say, “Wait a minute, you leave me here EVERY DAY!!” but so far it hasn’t happened.
Daycare Lady doesn’t think it will happen, because he’s “such a happy, confident little guy” but NotMaryP, who has 19 years of experience on my own Daycare Lady, warns me that pretty much every baby goes through some separation tears in the first month of settling in.
In the meantime, I’m wavering between deep relief every time he lets me escape with a minimum of guilt, and slight concern that my baby doesn’t care whether or not I’m around.
Pumping at work is a problem.
A vet clinic is not your normal work atmosphere. There are hypothetical lunch breaks (we certainly go 30 minutes unpaid each shift for said lunch hour) but whether or not one gets to take an entire one, or even one at all, is left very much up to fate.
You have to understand that this is not a problem with THIS clinic. This is a problem in ALL clinics. When the vet needs you to restrain a thrashing patient, or when a surgery needs to be done, or the phone is ringing off the hook, it is simply Not Done to say “I’ll be with you in 20 minutes.”
So some days I get time to scarf down a lunch, and other days I do not. Pumping has to wait until a lull, and it gets precedent over eating. Sometimes that lull doesn’t happen until one in the afternoon, when my breasts are full to the brim. Even so, it’s ten minutes of agonized hiding in the bathroom and pumping away, only to produce 3 ounces total for my time.
And ten minutes feels like a LONG TIME when you can hear phones ringing, the vet calling out for help, and the “ding” of more people coming in the door.
In the morning, when Babby wakes up at 5 in the morning, I rush downstairs and pump a couple more ounces while PH tries to soothe a screaming baby who hasn’t eaten since 8:30 pm (on a good night) or at least one or two (on a bad night).
So he goes to daycare with 5 ounces or so of milk in his sippy cup, and Daycare Lady spoke to me on Friday and said that it’s simply not enough. He needs more. She talked to me about considering formula or cow’s milk to supplement.
I hate to go that route.
I had been hoping that solid food would fill that gap in his nutrition, but I guess it isn’t. And I can’t criticize Daycare Lady for simply not feeding him more. She gives me a run down each day of what he has eaten. The kid eats more than I do.
Here is Friday’s list:
- one egg scrambled with flaxseed pita
- One small bowl of cheerios
- one cup of blueberry yoghurt
- a few goldfish crackers
- one bowl of cut up pear
- one plate of rice with beef/lamb kebab and tomatoes,
- one bowl of plain Greek yoghurt
- one tablespoon of vanilla ice cream
- one bowl of cut up red grapes
- a few animal crackers
- a whole banana
And this is the day that she told me that he needs more milk.
She very well may be right, because for the last two days, basically since I got home Saturday evening until, well, NOW, Babby has been latched onto my boob.
His nights, which had settled down into a sleep through the night on a good night or one or two wakeups on a bad night, has relapsed into regular, every two or three hour wake ups. And he WON’T go to sleep without a good feed each time.
I feel like our sleep training has taken a serious step back, because he isn’t being sung to sleep the last couple of nights – he is nursing until he is finally sated.
HELP, SHE'S STARVING MEEEEEEEEEEE!
To be fair, when I put him down, he rolls over and goes to sleep on his own. But if we put him down before he is done nursing, he just screams and signs for “MILK” in an emphatic way which is impossible to ignore. We’re afraid to ignore it, anyway, after the “he needs more milk” talk.
Do 11 month olds go through cluster feedings?
What do I do? Get a better pump? Put him onto cow’s milk? FORMULA?
If By Yes 
What about water? Could she not give him water during the day and then you can nurse him in the morning and evenings? I don’t think that you need to continue on with nothing but breastmilk given his age and the fact that he is eating so much regular food.
I never went the formula route – I did nothing but breastmilk until 6 months. Then around 10 1/2 months I started giving my girl a little bit of full fat cow’s milk and water once in a while. By 11 1/2 months when I went back to work, she’d happily drink cow’s milk when I wasn’t there. I have to say, not having to pump was fabulous!
My vote? Milk or water to when you are not there and you just let him nurse a little more at night. Just my two cents!
She gives him water now, but she says it isn’t satisfying him. I’ll probably go with cow’s milk… he’s practically a year old anyway. I mean, he was due NOW last year, so if he’d been born on time he’d be 12 months old…
I can’t leave you any excellent advice. We didn’t make it on breastfeeding this long. I know letting go of it can be hard, but also keep in mind that the toll of the stress of trying to pump and working and daycare is also hard. No matter what you decide, make sure you’re looking after not just Babby’s physical health, but your own.
I will say that we started the Bug on cow’s milk at 12 months and I swear that kid drinks a quarter of a gallon a day. Whole milk is WAY cheaper than formula (oh, how I hated paying so much for that stuff!) and much easier to deal with. It’s also almost the time when most kids start using sippy cups, in case you feel like doing that.
Otherwise sounds like growth spurt time.
Take care of yourself, okay? You’ve done a great job feeding Babby. Just don’t beat yourself up if it isn’t giong perfectly.
Oh, and I should add, water probably isn’t enough. When summer started, the Bug started preferring water to milk (understandably) but he also fell smack off the growth curve. Got super skinny, looked almost ill to me. We started him back on whole milk a month ago and he looks perfectly healthy again. The fat in the whole milk is really important, water won’t quite do it.
Yes, he’ll only drink out of his sippy cup. The first day I left him with a bottle and he hardly touched his milk. Since then, it’s been sippy cup city.
And Babby has enough weight gain problems as it is, without us making him skinny with water!
With one serving of breast milk and two of yogurt, he’s getting plenty of dairy, so water should be sufficient for the rest of his liquids. I’d say this more an emotional matter than a physical one. He loves YOU, boob-lady, you and your wonderful, comfort-ful boobs. Which is not to say you don’t let him nurse as much as he likes, for the transitional weeks at any rate, only that you don’t need to worry that he’s starving. If that’s his intake in a day, starving he ain’t!
I’m not suggesting you refrain from cow’s milk. Not at all. As you say, he’s pretty much a year old, anyway. Whether or not he needs the milk for actual nourishment, your caregiver will appreciate being able to offer him the comfort a bottle brings. He’ll like it, too.
Oops. No bottles. Okay, then. Sippy cup.
I don’t understand how this kid eats SO MUCH and isn’t enormous!
If you are completely full yet only getting 3 ozs from your pump, either your pump totally sucks (no wait–doesn’t suck, therefore sucks), you are not having a let-down reflex while pumping, or both. Are you double-pumping (both boobas at once)? Can you borrow a better pump from someone?
If you are going to give him cow’s milk eventually, choose that instead of formula.
I’m getting SOME let down – a gush on each boob, which is good for about a half an ounce. The rest is laboriously squeezing out build-up, but it takes forever!
I was having some let-down issues while pumping at work, and I tried all sorts of things I read. I don’t know if any will work for you, with the environment you describe. 🙂 I’d read that it might help to involve all the senses: so, I took some pictures I could look at, and I’d seal his jammies up in a plastic baggie so I sould sniff them while looking at the pictures and trying to relax enough for let-down.
Do you have an electric pump at this point, or are you still using the manual one?
Good luck!
Some people just don’t have good luck pumping – I never did. Lots of let-down, a nice big gush of milk for a couple of ounces, and then… nothing.
I also couldn’t pump AT ALL unless I was in a secure, quiet room… with no distractions… and no time pressures… exactly the opposite of what you’re describing. Frankly in the work environment you have I don’t know how you’re getting any milk out at all.
At this age, rather than starting him on formula, I would go for cow’s milk, I think. If this analogous situation helps at all: the 15 month old I look after gets one bottle of milk (soy in his case, he’s allergic to dairy) each day when he’s with me, before his afternoon nap. The rest of the day, he eats a varied diet of solid foods and gets as much water as he likes in his sippy cup. He’s a solid, healthy little guy and has his nutritional needs amply met. I understand he gets another bottle before bed (he’s been weaned for a while, he has a baby sister who is getting the booba) but those two are all he wants… and he’s starting to taper off the afternoon bottle on his own anyway (doesn’t always finish it).
It seems like Babby shouldn’t need THAT much milk when he’s eating so much. Glad to know other babies are surviving off of just a bottle or so…
Holy cow! (No pun intended. :P) That’s a lot of food!! My almost-two-year-old probably doesn’t eat that much in any two days. I’d say he’s definitely NOT starving.
I’m also thinking cow’s milk might be the way to go, certainly over costly formula. Have you ever given it to him? Since he doesn’t appear fussy, you could probably just start him on it straight, but you could also consider mixing it with your own at first and gradually increasing to all cow’s milk. (And if you wanted to keep breastfeeding at night, I believe most women find their supplies keep going for the feeds you choose as long as you consistently keep them up.)
This kid just packs it away, but he isn’t very big!
Crazy baby.
My friend’s kids are like that. And it’s mostly really healthy stuff they eat, too. Some kids just must be hungrier than others. And aren’t picky. I’m jealous. 😉
I didn’t have much luck with pumping, particularly after the first three months. Pumping was fine in the early stages, but after those first months I would get next to nothing. I’m sure I read somewhere that this is not uncommon – possibly something to do with the way your breasts adapt and change the longer you feed. Anyway, even if it’s nothing to do with that, I do think you’ve got next to no chance what with all those distractions.
I agree with the others that you’re certainly close enough to 12 months to go the cows milk route, no need for formula. And he must be getting plenty of really good nutrition from that diet – that’s great.
And, since he’s still more than happy to nurse from you, then you’ll still be able to keep the feeding and the closeness going, even just with morning and night feeds.
I hope to keep those feeds up for a long time.
It’s unfortunate that he never took to a soother or sucked his thumb. All this boob action may just be him filling up on comfort rather than the boob juice itself. Even if you do switch him to cow’s milk while you’re at work, you can still breast feed him as much as you (or he) likes when you’re with him. The Girl was down to one feeding from one boob a day for a long time before she weened entirely. All the wild boob action may settle down once he settles into this new routine. Babies are quite adaptable that way.
I wish he would suck his thumb. I really, really do.
Oh, I wish I had a good idea for you. I never had a great milk supply, so I relied on about 25% formula. It was what it was… Then again, I was able to pump at my desk, and therefore be on the phone or computer. But I also was never called to wrestle a poodle into surgery…
I wish I could pump at my desk. If only the vets weren’t men! In my old clinic, which was all-female, I would have felt comfortable hanging out anywhere and pumping.
Oh I had a serious debate with the ladies that own a breastfeeding shop about cow’s milk vs. formula. Alex wasn’t gaining weight and he wasn’t much of an eater either (still isn’t). His doctor recommended formula until he was 18 months old. I gave him formula and cow’s milk (so he’d get used to the taste of regular milk). The BF shop ladies argued that cow’s milk was better and that he shouldn’t be on formula. I informed them that formula has slightly more calories in it that cow’s milk (which they didn’t believe).
All this to say, give Babby which ever one you’d feel more comfortable giving him.
Some lactivists are nuts. Of course formula is better than cow’s milk! It’s been specially formulated to be better for babies than plain old milk.
I’ll try him on cow’s milk and if he can’t tolerate it, I’ll buy some formula.
I can’t give much help in terms of breast feeding and pumping, but I know that my nephew is two years old and eats A TON, and always has and he’s tiny, like barely bigger than most one year old babies so I wouldn’t worry too much about the food intake:baby size ratio.
I’m hoping it means he has a good metabolism!
Hi, I figured since I went through a similar situation I’d respond. My son was starting to sleep though the night shortly before I went back to work at six months and as soon as I went back he totally reversed and starting waking up more often than ever before. After talking to my good friend who is an LC I realized he was doing what is called Reverse Cycling. http://www.kellymom.com/bf/normal/reverse-cycling.html
Super common when a nursing mother goes back to work, the baby starts eating more solids during the day and starts waking more at night to nurse. It was at this point that I started co-sleeping because I was starting to not be able to function at work with the no sleep. I would pump at work once maybe twice. It was far easier for me to pump with no distractions but I still found I really needed to be able to concentrate and not feel anxious that my space would be invaded to get a good output. For the first few months I also needed triggers. So for example, right before I started to pump I would look at pictures of my son, watch videos, etc. I always got a better let down / flow that way. Is there any chance you can run out to your car to pump for 10 minutes? It will be a pain in the ass for your co-workers perhaps in the beginning but maybe once they see this is a must for you they will quickly become comfortable with it. It was really key for me to have quiet, non stress pump time. My husband took the second six months off with my son and during months 6-12 he normally only had 1-2 5 ounce bottles each day while I was gone and then I would need to feed him as soon as I got home. If the babysitter feels he needs more bmilk simply because he is eating so much I would maybe try and reassure her that he is still getting lots. Your supply will auto adjust as well so you will start making more milk at night and less during the day. He is almost a year so I would say not to bother with formula and go right to cow/goat homo milk. I think most doctors/LC’s would agree there isn’t as much point in getting him adjusted to formula to switch it again in a few months anyways. This also depends on whether you or your husband have allergies, no allergies the safer it is to start cows/goats milk, etc. My son is almost two and we are just weaning now, but have not had an intensive nursing relationship for the last year – he has been drinking cows milk alongside nursing for the last year. I stopped pumping when he was a year old and the transition was fine, he didn’t need to have bmilk during the day and was able to get more than enough before work, after work, in the evening, etc. The other thing is that if you have not been a regular pumper it might just be that you need to build up to getting a better output. It sort of goes in a cycle, so in the beginning not as much, builds up to more and then typically once someone has been pumping for a long time they start to get a smaller and smaller output. Again this is just the average, everyone’s experiences can be different. The last thing that I did was take Fenugreek and sometimes Blessed Thistle to increase my supply so that when I did pump during the day I got more.
Sorry for the lengthy probably all over the place reply. I claim nothing other than my own experiences. If you have any questions please feel free to email me!
Thanks so much for your detailed reply! I think sneaking out to the car might be a good idea…
Ok this is way more info than I typically post about myself on the interwebs, but the best pump I ever found (and the pain in the arse) was expressing by hand – I could get out 8 oz in less than 2 minutes and I didn’t have to pack around something that looked like some kinky sex toy in my purse.
The additional detail of this is that when expressing by hand you sort of can feel where the milk still is, which is why I found it effective whereas the pumpy doo-dads just kept sucking which is less like babby and more like attaching a vaccum to your nipple. Why would you vaccuum…why….
I have heard this from a number of people! I’ve tried it, but the squirts go everywhere except in the bottle. Any tips?
You have to put the nipple right into the bottle. It helps to have something with a wide neck, like a jar, actually.
yup, I might even have the funky shaped tupperware container I used, it was the perfect shape — I’d pump into there, and then pour into the bottle for freezing. It was about 4″ deep and about the same circ as my boob.
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