I haven’t updated on the Owl Sleep Situation in quite a long while, and there’s a reason for that.
I have no idea what the hell is going on.
If he were sleeping badly I could say “his sleep still sucks!”
If he were sleeping wonderfully I could say “his sleep is amazing!”
But it’s so random, so unpredictable, that I honestly don’t know what to tell you.
The GO the F*** To Sleep program works – I’ll give it that. The day before Owl started daycare he slept through the night. But then daycare messed it up. Once we were convinced that he wasn’t starving to death, we decided to reinstitute the program. But Owl kept getting sick.
It basically has been yo-yoing like this:
We start getting Owl to sleep without the breast at night
He starts sleeping for longer stretches.
He gets sick.
He coughs himself awake every 20 minutes.
We get desperate and start letting him nurse himself to sleep.
And then it starts all over again.
After the croup incident we decided to kick it up a notch by actually night weaning him. We tried the Dr. Jay Gordon method, which I discovered through the Leaky Boob.
It is very much like my No Cry Sleep Solution method, which is very like Pug Mama’s Go The F*** To Sleep method. But just as Pug Mama’s method was No Cry kicked up a notch, the Jay Gordon method is kicked up another notch, because he has a TIMELINE.
I didn’t blog about it because I had no time for blogging because I hated my life.
But it totally worked. We were tired, but even by the third and fourth night there were huge improvements seen. It helped that Owl is an old hand by now at being refused booba at night. Once he catches on that we’re serious again he goes right to sleep.
In fact, on night 5 he slept through the night. We were like “THIS IS AMAZING.”
Then guess what happened?
GO ON, GUESS.
Right. HE GOT SICK. The next night, night 6, he coughed himself awake CONSTANTLY and while he would go to sleep if one of us sung to him from the gliding rocker, he would immediately start to cry when that same parent left the room no matter how deeply asleep he appeared to be when we tiptoed out.
PH wanted to give in. I refused. I ended up falling asleep ON THE FLOOR next to the crib and waking up very, very stiff two hours later.
The next night, night 7, was worse, if anything. I fell asleep on the floor next to the crib again. PH dubbed me insane, said there was no point in sleep training a sick baby, and I reluctantly agreed with him.
Owl had found his way back onto my boob.
When he got better we tried to re-implement the criteria, but we couldn’t quite make it through the night. At around 3 or 4 am, we’d let him come to bed with us. After all, we said to each other, Dr. Gordon says to pick a 6-7 hour stretch through the night. Instead of picking 11-6, maybe we were just going to do 9-4.
And that’s sort of how it stayed. On good nights, Owl sleeps until 3 or 4 in the morning, and then PH brings him to bed with me. On bad nights, he wakes up multiple times and we sing him to sleep, USUALLY without booba.
The first time PH said “It’s time to go to sleep, Owl”, and Owl immediately stopped crying and lay down, he said it was like a miracle. That’s what he does, now, because when he hears those words he knows it’s serious.
But I really wish we could get past that 3 am stretch, because it would sure be nice to wake up some morning without a baby jumping on my head or trying to tie knots in my nipples.
And I’m sure PH would appreciate NOT getting kicked out of bed at 3 in the morning every day.
So we need to crack down and finish the night weaning some time soon.
Unfortunately, now we’ve also lost the help of the seahorse, but that’s another story…
Oh, I can so relate! This is exactly how it went for me, with both kids. The only thing that eventually worked to wean Liam was getting pregnant with Jonah…
So, um. Yeah. I’m royally screwed this time.
The deadline of March 12th (my trip to Montreal for five days begins then) is looming over me and causing me great stress. Especially since Jonah is currently sick, again. And barely eats. Ugh. Mom said to me the other day “Well, you COULD bring him if you had to, right? I could play with him while you and your sister go do stuff.” I think she’s given up all hope that it’s going to happen.
Maybe the trip will be the weaning process? It’s cold turkey, but at his age it’s not going to be too traumatising. I know Owl is fine without milk as long as I’m not THERE. When I’m not there he goes all day without nursing. It’s just when he sees me he thinks “BOOBS!”
Well, that would really screw Chris. He can’t function with no sleep, and he’ll be here alone with both boys to look after day and night. So I’d really like to get the hard part over with as soon as we can. Jonah can definitely go all day without me, and he can also fall asleep without nursing, too. But he can’t seem to STAY asleep without the boob. He is SOOOOO restless most nights, and the only thing to get him back to sleep for longer than an hour is the boob, unfortunately. I’ve tried rocking him, patting his back, etc. Those things used to work for Liam, but not Jonah. It’s frustrating!
The plan since Christmas has been to have me sleep in the spare room and Jonah and Chris in our room alone when Chris was next on eves (and one of us can sleep in in the mornings if need be before he goes to work). But then he went away for two weeks, and now Jonah’s sick. I was intending to start tonight to give us a ten day window to get the process going, but it’s just not gonna happen now.
Additional pressure to wean: our doctor has been encouraging it for a while, and at his last visit when he turned two, she wanted to see him again at two-and-a-half because he’s not growing like he should be. I really want to have him weaned before then or else she’s just going to blame the breastfeeding. 😡
Isn’t parenthood fun? 😛
That’s nuts that she would blame the breastfeeding. If anything, taking in extra calories at night should help, not hinder! Do we like your doctor?
Grace Goldragon said:
Exactly what I was thinking.
Yes, we like our doctor very much…. except for this. It’s her quirk, I guess. She even told my friend to wean HER son at 13 months because he was borderline failure to thrive. I suggested waiting till she spoke with the pediatrician before doing that. He told her not to. So, there ya go! Vindication! 😉 But, yeah, she seems to be against it beyond a point. Otherwise, she’s really great so I overlook it.
At this point, though, he really SHOULD be getting most of his calories from food now and not me. But it’s tough, since he’s so small — I don’t want to take away his main source of nutrition, but he can’t keep nursing forever and not eat, you know? Ugh.
Annnnyway, I’ve taken over your post! Enough about my kid!
Ahhh, the joys of being Mommy the Human Pacifier. I have moved on to being Mommy the Human Handkerchief, Mommy the Constantly Moving Trashcan (I have actually started saying, “I am NOT the trashcan!” every time someone tries to hand me a gum wrapper), and MOMMMMMM the Perfect Scapegoat (“this is all YOUR fault!”). I have warned them that I could be Mommy Who Moved to Alaska (or better yet, mommy who moved to Vancouver to help Carol and eat lamb curry over rice) but they never take this seriously.
I feel your pain. Just know that I am living proof that yes, you will get through this.
Owl has already started bringing me trash, but right now I’m just so grateful when he does that instead of EATING it that I don’t mind yet!
I really recognise the thing about the illnesses and how they always come just when you think the sleep is beginning to be sorted out…
Frank actually weaned himself, more-or-less, when he was sixteen months old and got a bad cold. It was such a bad cold he couldn’t comfortably breathe and breast-feed at the same time, so he stopped for a few days, and then the milk had drastically diminished and it was no longer much fun for either of us, so we stopped altogether. But we still had him in our bed more often than not (still do. He toddles in at about 2am every night, bringing his Scoop the Digger toy with him, and happily settles down with his feet in my stomach.)
Hang in there xx
I think my milk supply has cut down quite a lot… if only he would get bored!
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