We own a house.
Now we just have to paint it.
…And put in new floors.
…And the back yard is a mass of weeds and crawling with ants.
BUT WE HAVE A HOUSE.
Okay, so the seller counter-offered… they won’t go a penny below what we offered, never mind any cash back for renovations. Which means if we want to do renovations, we have to offer MORE money and ask for cash back.
…or we can take the free money my father keeps trying to lend us.
It goes like this:
Me: Dad, we’re going to get a mortgage and buy a house.
Dad: Can you afford it? I can’t help you, you know. We’re in an economic downturn! My stocks have cut in half! I can’t help you! You’re on your own.
Me: That’s fine.
Me, to Pefect Husband: He always says stuff like that at first, and then when I don’t actually ask for anything, he starts offering more and more.
Perfect Husband: We can do this without help anyway. We have enough of a down payment.
Dad: Okay, I can lend you a little money. Like, I could help with the down payment and closing fees a little. Like, a couple thousand or something.
Me: We have a down payment, Dad, it’s fine. Depending on how big our mortgage ends up being, the money for the lawyers fees might be helpful. But that’s it.
Dad: I want to give you money to help you out.
Me: It’s fine, Dad. We have the downpayment. If you can help with the closing costs, that would help our cash flow, but that’s about it.
Dad: But… I want to give you money! Let me talk to your husband.
Me: I don’t think he’d be comfortable taking a lot of money from you, but here he is.
Dad: Let me give you money. I want to help.
Perfect Husband: Thanks, but we’re mostly ok. I said I would take care of your daughter, I don’t want to ask you for anything.
Dad: But… but… I can give you some money!
Me: They won’t go a penny less than 215. We’re going to have to increase our mortgage amount if we want to put in new flooring and paint.
Dad: I can give you 10,000 dollars. Please let me give you 10,000 dollars. Really, I won’t miss it. Will your husband accept 10,000 dollars? He can pay it back if he wants, but I don’t need it back.
Me: I don’t know… we can always live with bad linoleum and berber carpeting for a while.
Dad: 10,000 dollars! I has it!
Me: Well… you’ll have to walk to Pefect Husband. His pride’s on the line.
Dad: I respect him even more now! Let me give you lots of money!
So I’m going to have him talk to Perfect Husband tonight. Do we save our pride, and get a higher mortgage, or do we take the gift?
Okay, so, now we’re planning on making an offer on another unit in the complex. This one has sat on the market for a year, probably because their tenants understandably make no effort to pretty the place up when you come to view the home, plus there is a hole in the wall and the lino in the kitchen looks like it comes from the days of the pyramids (those egyptians were famous for their advanced working in vinyl).
We figure that if we make a low offer, plus 10,000 which the seller is to return to us upon the mortgage going through (kind of a cash-back arrangement), we will be able to use that extra money to renovate a bit. Put in some laminate flooring, new linoleum, paint, replace the washer/dryer and so on.
Let’s hope THIS place doesn’t get popular too. At least it has a yard. It’s a bizarre, five feet above the ground outside kind of a yard, and slanty, but it’s a yard.
We just signed an offer on a place.
In other news, my Perfect Husband wants me to see someone about depression. Apparently, being sad most of the time and then experiencing several hours of uncontrollable, wracking sobs with very little provocation isn’t normal. Who knew?
More on that later.