28 Friday Jun 2013
My FIL tends to put his own realistic spin on the usual congratulations for birthdays or anniversaries.
This year’s anniversary card was another gem, check it out:
We think that the original word was “all” but perhaps he thought this wish unrealistic or possibly even undesirable, since the bad times can be learned from?
Unsure.
Anyway, you can be this card will be treasured, because his personal touches are priceless.
21 Friday Jun 2013
A trip to Owl’s imagination often ends in strange places. The other day he approached me and said,
Owl: “Mommy, what do you want for play?”
Me: “Uh… do you want to play with your big green ball?”
Owl: “Nope, let’s play with my cars!”
He handed me a generic red plastic car that he often pretends is McQueen from the Pixar atrocity “Cars” (which he has never actually watched).
Owl: “You’re McQueen, and I’m Mater!”
Me: “Ok.”
McQueen and Mater then held the following conversation:
…
11 Tuesday Jun 2013
Posted in Life and Love, Perfect Husband, Well, That's Just Stupid
Tags
benedict cumberbatch, Enterprise, fail, khan, logic, movies, reviews, science, star trek, star trek: into darkness
A friend took Owl so we could go to a movie this weekend, so I dragged PH to Star Trek: Into Darkness.
Not because I thought it would be good but because I figured it would at least interest him.
It definitely INTERESTED him.
It also may have shrivelled his soul.
I’m not an original Star Trek fan. As much as I love George Takei, my knowledge of Star Trek starts with Captain Picard.
But PH is a genuine Trekkie, he even owns a detailed manual to the Enterprise, which he consults occasionally, so I was surprised that he was so accepting of the 2009 reboot. He was okay with the ending – he felt it left room for the director to make new story lines instead of simply rehashing old stuff.
So I figured this movie would be about the same.
Yeah, about that…
PH’s brain nearly exploded about two minutes into the movie, and it just went downhill from there. Even I, as a non-Trekkie, was offended.
If you are a Star Trek fan, you probably shouldn’t see this movie.
The funny thing is, when we mention it to people, including people who claim to be fans of the original series, they have all said “What? It was good…” Then PH starts pointing things out, and they go “Oh, well, yeah… yeah… you’re right… that didn’t make sense…”
So allow me to rephrase.
If you kind of liked Star Trek and you like movies that are shiny (like me), you should see this movie.
It is VERY shiny.
If you are a Star Trek fan and consider yourself a PURIST, which I think all true Trekkies DO, you should NOT see this movie.
Nor should you see it if you have an interest in, oh, SCIENCE.
I’ll start with non-spoilers, so don’t be afraid. I’ll warn you before I give away anything remotely important.
09 Sunday Jun 2013
Posted in Life and Love, TwiBashing
I am rereading Twilight, possibly out of self-hatred but ostensibly because I want to make sure that my Zombie Anti-Twilight story fully opposes it in every respect.
It’s mind numbing; I am reading it in bed at night only… to help me fall asleep.
What’s bothering me the most this time around are Edward’s looks. Bella, who forgets to breathe and doesn’t notice when she has come inside out of the rain, seems able to interpret the most complex facial expressions.
Like in the second chapter, when Edward looks at her with “unmet expectation” on his face.
Tell, me, WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE?
I keep twisting my face around trying to create this painfully specific expression, and I end up feeling like Joey Tribbiani doing his “I have a fish hook in my eyebrow and I like it” look.
And then, a couple chapters later, Edward looks at her incredulously, but his face is also “hard” and “defensive” at the same time.
I’ve been working on it. What do you think?
05 Wednesday Jun 2013
Posted in Life and Love, Me vs The Sad, Perfect Husband
Tags
Life is… challenging right now.
Perfect Husband is depressed. He has always been prone to it, and I think the miscarriage and the lack of support at his work and who knows what other factors have helped spur it on. I haven’t seem him this bad in years, so I am trying to give him breaks wherever possible. He does as much as he can, but he doesn’t have much emotional or physical energy right now. What he does have, I want him to devote to getting better.
Luckily, I think I started taking my antidepressants again in time, because I am not depressed.
But I am sad at times.
I get sad thinking about how, a month ago, we were happy and expecting a baby.
Now I have no baby to expect, and a damaged husband, and we are focusing on getting through life one day at a time. We’re short on money, because we’ve been eating out a lot rather than trying to summon the energy to cook. We’re trying to stay cheerful for Owl, but it exhausts us and when he is asleep we collapse into introverted silence.
I had a midwife appointment booked for today. In a parallel universe, maybe I will cheerfully attend it.
I am worried about my husband. I am worried I won’t get pregnant soon, that I’ll never have a second child or that Owl will be half grown by the time I get pregnant, when what we really wanted was a playmate for him.
I am worried that I WILL get pregnant but that PH’s depression won’t improve and I will be functionally a single parent with two kids.
Thinking about life scares me right now.
So I’m hiding.
When Owl is asleep, I spend a lot of time re-reading and editing my NaNoWriMo story, which is now complete with a beginning, a middle, and an end. Working on it helps me dwell in a dream world where I become a rich author, can stay home to write all day, and support PH so that he doesn’t have to go to work in that poisonous environment. Instead he could coach children’s soft ball and soccer teams, umpire sporting events, practice his curling skills, and do the other things he loves to do but has no time or energy for.
If I could just become a paid writer… do what I love and need to do and get paid for it… stay home all day on the computer…
So I dream.
Even though I know that it is just a kind of a joke of a story and unlikely to ever make me a penny.
What I should be focusing is on reality – washing the dishes that PH can’t wash, folding clean laundry so we can stop living out of a hamper, and pursuing new dog training clients to replace the money we have frittered away.
I need to stop hiding in dreams.
