I thought I would transcribe my last 24 hours or so for your perusal. Behold the glamorous existence of the working mother of a toddler. It’s going to be exciting. Are you excited?
4:02 AM
Perfect Husband brings Owl to me in bed, as neither of us feels able to deal with another wake-up. Owl nurses and I go back to sleep.
5:19 AM
Awoken by a heavy weight bouncing up and down on my neck, the musty scent of a pee-filled diaper, and a tiny voice going “Mama Horsey! MAMA HORSEY!”
Go back to sleep after giving a quarter-hearted “neigh…”
5:23 AM
“Mama up! MAMA UP!”
“It’s still sleepy time, Owl.” He may or may not understand me, because I am speaking directly into my pillow.
5:26 AM
“MILK! MIIIIIIILK!! PEEEEASE!”
6:35 AM
Perfect Husband walks into the room to find me lying prone with Owl nursing upside down on top of me, with most of his body sprawled on top of my face.
6:38 AM
I am slapped repeatedly on the head.