I’m very tired today.
Owl had a bad night, and I think I got a grand total of three hours of sleep. As a result, I was especially dopey at work today.
It wasn’t a BAD day. I didn’t make any huge screw ups. The new vet is nice enough. But every little correction or direction he gives me hits me right in the self esteem.
“Can you just put the lube onto gauze first, instead of directly onto the thermometer? It’s more sterile.”
“You’re filthy, stupid, and must have been trained by chimpanzees.”
“Can you remember to close that door when there’s a dog in there? The yapping noise drives me crazy.”
“You can’t even walk through a door right.”
Clearly,I still have a lot of anxiety around work.
I feel like everyone there sees me as incompetent. I have no idea whether that interpretation is accurate.
I have a lot to say about self perception and competance, but tonight is not that night.
All I can say is that it’s no doubt the tiredness talking, but…
I feel valueless.
A least where work is concerned.
I wish that I could just go to work and just get EVERYTHING completely and totally right, and come home feeling good about myself.