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When I was a girl I wrote you a lot

with wish lists that I would compile great thought

believing and trusting that you would come through

with some of the stuff I requested from you.

I don’t think that readers will be shocked to hear

that some gifts were notably absent each year.

The ponies and power-wheels for which I would nag

clearly could not be tucked into your bag!

And no one could blame you, not even me

for failing to leave me a horse by the tree.

But now I am older and feeling more wise

So I will consider the issue of size!

My requests should cause you no trouble at all

for all of them are quite reasonably small:

I’m sure, as you know, I am only a tech,

so maybe you could please consider a check?

For the mortgage, assessment, vacations and such

a million or so would be fine: not too much.

And then, because, as you know, I do blog

but working and sleeping and the baby can hog

a lot of my time so more time would be great.

Or maybe just take some things off of my plate,

like some of the time that I spend on my whelp:

A baby who slept through the night would sure help.

If you can’t manage that, and you wish to atone,

I’d take wifi, a new hard drive, and a data plan for my phone.

Just one more thing I would ask for myself:

Perhaps you could spare me a single good elf?

He needn’t be burly, or much of a hunk

To tidy my house and to purge it of junk

That should be enough for Christmas this year

to fill my poor soul with the old Christmas cheer!