I’ve found a Vancouver talent agency that’s interested in Babby, although they warn me that business for babies is a little slow year-round. I’m not looking to turn him into a star or anything, but a substantial amount of my college fund was paid for by appearing in tv commercials and such, so I know it can be helpful. Even if we got Babby into one commercial, that would still likely be $2000 his RESP didn’t have in it before.
The agency wants a professional portrait for their files. I guess they have had too many experiences with parents going “Oh, actually, I dabble in photography myself, so here’s a photo that I took” while handing them a photo with dirty diapers in the background and a booger in the foreground.
The problem is, we have no money.
Zip. Dead broke.
Not only did we recently buy plane tickets home for the late spring/early summer, but our car has suddenly decided that it needs a new air compressor, new shocks, and a new battery, and it took $350 bucks just to find that out. We haven’t dared ask for an estimate for the actual repairs yet, but we need to do it soon.
The upshot of all this was that PH and I did something that we never, ever, in a million years, dreamed we would do.
We went to Walmart.
It is a testament to PH’s love for me and willingness to support me in my whims that he even set foot there. You see, we are intellectual snobs and Walmart stands for pretty much everything that we hate. Yes, there are a lot of other companies out there that are just as big and corporate and evil, but there’s just something about Walmart that feels especially trashtacular.
Walmart is attracts people who are willing to line up like cattle for the slaughter all for the sake of saving a dollar here, fifty cents there. In general, this does not tend to be your highest class of person, and now we had joined their ranks.
The (soul-destroying) reason that we went there anyway is that we got 30 prints, including an “enhanced” 10X13, for nine bucks.
All we had to do was:
- Show up on time for our appointment.
- Wait with an increasingly bored and tired baby for over an hour, while being repeatedly told “it’ll just be five more minutes… why don’t you have a stroll around the store?”
- Listen to people who showed up for an appointment booked later than ours, who then argued to the girl at the desk that they should get to go before us, because they booked an appointment for now, and their baby was younger.
- Listen to exchanges like “what are you snacking for? Now you’ve got shit all in your teeth,” between a mother and her young daughter.
- Accept that the picture was going to be unflattering and possibly even scary to look at.
By the time we got in to the studio, Babby was sleepy, red eyed and nose-rubbing, and it took a long time to get a good smile from him. When we did, the red and watery eyes were noticeable in the portrait, and there was a black hair stuck to a booger under his nose, which may or may not show up in the enlargements. I’m not sure the picture will really show him off to his best advantage, but the agency wanted a studio portrait, and by gum, they’ll get one.
Except we have to wait two weeks for the portraits to be developed. Even though there is an 24 hour photo processing centre in the exact same room.
But hey, it cost less than ten bucks.
You’re coming to my studio when you come home. I’ll fix you up. I promise, no wait at all, and I can give you the friend-rate (ie free) if you let me use the photos in one one of my contests 🙂
I know the soul-suckingness of walmart studios…imagine working there 😦
It’s a deal!!
Can I “like” that comment? ‘Cause THANK GOODNESS. I’m pretty sure Walmart does no post-processing – and if they do, it’s probably awful. (Erin, you’re my new hero. =)
The comment above sounds like a good offer, but you could provide one of your own photos as well as the studio portrait, to show just how soul-meltingly cute he can be given the chance.
By the way, Frank has advanced another step in his campaign to Rule the World through Being Utterly Irresistible, and has learnt to say “cuddle”. As in “Frank, why are you throwing my shoes down the stairs?” (And he responds, with outstretched arms): “Cuddle!”
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
lower class person here.
be weary of “talent agencies”. every baby is talented to them as long as mommy and daddy bring their wallets…. not saying Babby isn’t, just sayin.
Yes, you should be wary of anyone who tries to get money out of you. A real talent agency never charges you money to be taken on. It’s actually against the law in Canada. Any “talent agency” that charges the parents money is fraudulent. Only if he actually gets a job will they take a commission of 15% (that’s the industry standard).
A lot of people think that kids have to be especially cute to get into commercials, but that’s not true – they just have to be outgoing enough to be willing to play in front of all those people and all the equipment! I never minded it, although when I got older I quit because it was taking up too much of my precious summer vacation!
ya, don’t be a mean mommy, let him play his summers away:) but really, if he can earn enough money now that he wont have to work through his teen years that would be cool too.
It’s worth a try, anyway, right?
I strongly dislike WalMart but I shop there every week. I have no other choice in this small town as the other grocery stores are pricey and not that nice either. I would love to drive one hour to the nearest Super Target but that’s not a practical option when both parents work full time.
As for studio portraits, my husband refuses to do them at all. He hates the forced poses. My mum had spaces on her wall, waiting in vain for a studio portrait of my three kids to join her other grandchildren. She eventually gave up and just enlarged and framed her favorite everyday pics.
I’ll give the staff at Walmart this – they did their job fine. They didn’t try to force Babby into unnatural poses. They just got us to plunk him down and let him do his thing – they had squeaky toys and bears to get his attention and lots of silly faces at the ready!
Babby is so cute- I look forward to seeing him in various commercials and ads!
I hated that people of Walmart website you linked to- it’s particularly cruel and callous.
I don’t like it when they make fun of fat people. But I do enjoy some of the odder pictures – it’s people watching, condensed!
wouldn’t it be awesome if the pictures come back and they’re the best pictures you’ve ever seen in your life? i’m sure they’ll be just fine, but it would be cool if they were exceptional:)
i’m just glad i’m not on that people of walmart site picking one of my numerous wedgies:)
LOL
It would certainly be amazing! Maybe the reason it takes two weeks is because they do digital touch-ups? /unreasonable hope
Have you ever been in a Publix?
It’s everything Walmart is, except the opposite. It’s where people in Heaven buy milk.
No, I never have! We don’t have them in Canada.
They don’t have them much outside Florida and Atlanta, Ga. I have no idea what the upper/middle-class grocery store is in Canada, but in the South it’s Publix. Everything is wonderfully clean and organized. The employees are usually pleasant and helpful. And it partners with United Way to train mentally disabled people to be baggers so they can get a job.
It’s a few cents more than most other stores, but it’s so worth it.
My God. I’ve just looked at the Walmart site. I agree it’s cruel, but I also ask myself – why do these people do this to themselves?
I can safely say that never in a million years would you see anyone dressed like any of these people in Ireland. (Except maybe the scruffy old tramp types.)
Not in Canada, either, really.
For a while the trashy look of choice in Ireland (for women) was pyjamas. You could tell where the posh areas stopped and the rougher ones started by the appearance of teenagers (and indeed older women) walking down the street in their pyjamas. It looked incongruous, but it was comfortable and modest, at least.
Pyjama pants hit a “cool” phase a few years ago here…
My fave is the addition of SLIPPERS to the ensemble. Just saw one yesterday at a kids’ party place.
Pictures! Yay! I like looking at cute pictures of cute babies, no matter where they come from. 😉
An idea for the future, or if they don’t work out so well: maybe see if there’s anyone listing on your local kijiji as a new photographer looking to build their portfolio with work for lower prices. You can find amazing, up-and-coming talent that way.
Now I want to see if I can find an agency to sign Jonah to…
I don’t know if your area is a big film town, but it’s worth checking.
Yay for Erin! And this: “what are you snacking for? Now you’ve got shit all in your teeth,” was sadly hilarious.
I always want to shower after going in Walmart.
YES