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The last two mornings, I have woken up comfortable in my bed in a puddle of sunshine. I have thought “things are getting better,” and “all this fuss over nothing. Perfect Husband should have let me go into work today.”
Then, the phone would ring.
I would moan, cover my head with the quilt, and ignore the ring. I was terrified that it might be work. Calling to say what? It didn’t matter. I didn’t want to deal with it. When it would turn out to have been a friend, calling to see how I was, or the mental health clinic calling to check up on me, or the flooring guys finally wanting to put in the linoleum… I would still stay in bed, avoiding the return call, avoiding the world.
Cocooning for a while can be a good and healthy thing. You certainly deserve a break and a while to be gentle with yourself. Keeping your work far, far away from you right now is NOT unhealthy avoidance to feel guilty for in any way, shape or form that I can see.
If there are any activities outside of the house you think might sound okay, though (maybe hanging out in a beach or park or going for short walks, going to a fluffy movie, getting a massage, sipping hot chocolate in a not-too-busy cafe, that sort of thing) I would encourage you to try one out and see how it goes if you’re up to it.
For me personally, a few days without leaving the house can easily reinforce any social anxieties I have and when I finally do venture back out, the world feels like a much more foreign and intimidating. I quickly forget how to exist in a world with other people without continual practice. I didn’t notice this until my psychologist pointed it out and often thought that a little period of rest and recupperation would be good for the mind. Now when things start getting worse I avoid really challenging interactions but I make a point of doing something that requires me to put on pants every day, even if it’s only to go to the end of the street to get the mail or sit in the yard while there are neighbours out, and that has made a tremendous difference. Sunshine is probably a factor as well.
This is something I know about me, not about you. I am not trying to tell you what you “should” do or make you feel bad about lying around the house in the same pair of cozy jammies for a week straight if you feel like that’s what you need.
Goodnight, and sweet dreams.
I know what you mean. I went with Perfect Husband to pick up the Thai food we ordered the other night and the world seemed strange and alien.
I think, as an introvert, it is all too easy to fall into the cocoon state. We don’t NEED the outside world the way that extroverts do, and it takes continual work and practice to be able to manage all the stimulation and stress that it brings into our lives.
Then again, being an introvert, it is important to be able to shut out the outside world when it gets to be too much.
I’m venturing out today – PH has to go back into work so I’m going to come with him and sit at a computer.